Peace in Pain

Every Saturday I usually swing by the bank to drop off my cash tips, that I’ve received from my delivery job, for that week. If any of you guys have ever worked a commission based job before, you know that you can never really plan around what you may get. Some days you may make near a couple of hundred, and some days, nothing. It’s a gamble, but I have found a good medium to shoot for and, typically, manage to hit it.

This month, though, I’ve been running short on cash due to holiday expenditures. So I was hoping, praying, that maybe I could do a little above average this week. To catch up on some bills. After counting through my weeks wages once, twice, four times, I found I didn’t make enough… in fact I didn’t even manage to break anywhere near even.

The short answer being, unless in the few remaining work days I have left this month I manage to make out like a freaking bandit, or I have a wealthy uncle in Peru, that I didn’t know about, who would love to send me a million dollars, I won’t be able to afford rent this month.

Needless to say, worry has been eating me inside out this morning.

“I don’t understand, I took extra shifts, I tried to take good deliveries, I stayed longer at the restaurant. I even applied to other jobs just to get no response!”

“Why this time of year? Why did I have to get hit with this shit now? During Christmas? The time of year when there is supposed to be peace on earth or some shit?!”

I meditated on this thought for a while. ‘Why would this be happening now? How am I supposed to be happy when I am experiencing so much pain and worry?’

Then I discovered something. This is what Christmas and the holiday season is about. Finding peace in pain. Joy in adversity, love in death.

To realize this, I really had to think about why the holidays are when they are. In the winter. The season that, for most of human history, has been associated with death.

Think about it. Winter is a depressing season. In winter, crops die, the trees are barren, and everything tucks away into a hole to seek shelter from the harsh weather. Before more modern days, If you didn’t prepare for the winter during the rest of the year, you were straight up dead come January.

So what do you do when faced with such extreme adversity as when the very elements turn against you? You find a reason to celebrate, to be thankful. This is one of the reasons why we as a species we decided to hold our biggest festivals at the end of the year, during the most depressing season. To find joy in the midst of pain. Because this time will pass, winter will end and the flowers will bloom again.

We just need that reminder. That, just because there may be death around use, doesn’t mean we have to be. If we live in life, live in joy, then adversity will lose some of it’s sting. Time still passes and another season is just around the corner.

***

I hope all of you guys out there have a fantastic Holiday season, and thank you so much for joining me! It has been an incredible year full of change and growth, and 2016 is just going to be better! Until then, enjoy some eggnog and a little Irving Berlin.

With all the love,

Remy

P.S. Keep kicking ass

(Photo Credit: pixabay.com)

NOTW: Un-certainty is the only certainty

Wait a minute. . . it’s not Saturday. Why is there a new post? What is this madness?!

That’s right boys and girls! We are doing something different this week! May I be the first one to welcome you to a new segment here on the Punk Musical, ‘Notes on the wall’!

“Notes on the wall? What does that even mean?!” I hear you asking. Well for an explanation, I will need to give a little background.

A few months ago, when the not-so-metiphorical shit hit the oh-so-literal fan, I was feeling pretty depressed and lost (for additional background check out the ‘About the Punk’ page). So I decided to do the most cliche thing I could think and wrote myself a letter. A letter about all the good things in my life, and about how generally awesome I was.

Except that I was to lazy to actually even write a whole letter, so I compromised with sticky notes. Sticky notes that I put on a wall adjacent to my bed so that they where in view throughout the entire room.

The thing was though, I was only planning to do a couple of them. Just to be visual reminders that things will get better and I will get out of my slump.

Here’s the thing though, I am up to like twenty five now and my wall is covered. Not only that, but I have them color coded depending on the subject!

I can’t really explain why I kept doing it. I guess it was because I just wanted to try to keep account of all the good in my life, and how it should be cherished.

So I had the realization the other week that I didn’t want to just keep that to myself. I wanted to share it with you guys! Just a few things that either, I have learned to been thankful for this week or has inspired me.

This week I discovered how thankful I am for the uncertain.

Sounds weird right? If someone would have gone back in time and told me that, I would have first asked how they managed that whole time travel thing, and then asked about that whole ‘thankful for the uncertain’ thing to. I guess.

The reason the uncertain particularly appeals to me right now is because, up to a few month ago, I could have probably told you exactly what my life my have look like ten years from them. I was on a steady track up management within the company, and probably would have eventually landed some sort of general manager position.

Sounds . . . fun

But now, I couldn’t tell you where I would be two months from now, let alone ten years. While the uncertainty can be scary, it’s also liberating in a way. That anything can happen!

Who knows what tomorrow holds, could be a cake!

I challenge you guys to find something that your thankful for this week. Though there is always crap in this world, there is also always something to be thankful for. It could be from working that job you always wanted, or that you simply have another day of life.

So, what are you guys thankful for this week? Feel free to comment below with your answer or hit me up on twitter @punkmusical!

(Photo Credit: d.umn.edu)